Adoption Scammers

Sadly, adoption scammers are a real thing. Since our journey began we have been contacted several times by people claiming to have pregnancies or young children to adopt. In all those cases, there was no child and no pregnancy.

As part of our adoption journey we have been forced to join resource groups that share stories about these men and women. They usually keep their stories similar and reuse details. Adoption Advocates and adopting families turn the tide, and band together to share information so that the scammers can't negatively impact our amazing families. We go post the details of the involvement to help others see the red flags.

There are two primary kinds of adoption scammers.

1. Financial Scammer - There is a pregnancy, they will enter arrangements with you and accept financial assistance and cost of living expenses with no intention of adoption. They plan to parent their child but will use you to fund their lifestyle in the mean time. They begin their financial requests immediately after finding you, and are often working together in groups. They are usually extremely easy to work with in the beginning, and then their stories start to fall apart.

2. Emotional Scammer - These are usually women who contact adopting families to mess with them. Some times it is a man pretending to be a woman. There is rarely an actual pregnancy or adoptable child. They want to make you cry, ask for detailed emotional explanations, and rarely ask for cash. They want to be taken care of or loved and will fake a pregnancy to try to have strangers be nice to them while they perpetrate despicable fraud.

Protect your family and always trust your gut. Listen when they speak, don't give away any personal information, and write things down. Also, refer them directly to your social worker or attorney and do not make any arrangements prior to verifications.
 

Hi Village!

We have continued to plug away at our homestudy paperwork. A homestudy sounds like a very simple thing. It sounds like someone comes to your house, looks around, and decides whether or not you are worthy to foster or adopt. It's a very deceptive title due to the 30 steps, and obscene amount of paperwork that is involved. It has taken us just over a month to tick off a handful of paperwork items on our task list. #28 is the item that is the actual Homestudy. The items in bold have been completed. We must attend our application interview next to proceed to finish our task list. We have completed 18 of 30 steps.

1. Upload Photo
2. Pay Application Fee ($1,000)
3. Pay Technology Fee ($150)
4. Application Interview
5. Register for Adoptive Parent Preparation Class
6. Update Placement Preferences (after class)
7. Types of Adoption
8. Autobiography for Applicant 1
9. Autobiography for Applicant 2
10. Medical Assessment for Applicant 1
11. Medical Assessment for Applicant 2
12. Pediatric Medical Assessment
13. Home Safety Standards Checklist
14. Marriage Certificate
15. Divorce Decrees (if applicable)
16. Child Adoption Decree or Birth Certificate
17. Financial Disclosure
18. Income Verification
19. Fee Agreement
20. Print Background Check Instructions
21. Fingerprint Waiver
22. Print and Sign Fingerprint Release (Applicant 1)
23. Print and Sign Fingerprint Release (Applicant 2)
24. References
25. Directions to Home
26. Pay Homestudy Fee ($2,500)
27. Confirm All Homestudy Tasks and Documentation Submitted to Agency
28. Home Visit and Interviews
29. Review Sample Birthparent Letter
30. Upload Birthparent Letter. 

Chucktober: Day 31

Chucktober Day 31: Thats it kids. We've reached the end of our converse yellow brick road. You've seen my rainbow, heard some of my secrets and know all the different shoes I wear for different roles in my life. This project has backfired several times, forced some hard realizations and has been eye opening for me. I've been very uncomfortable speaking candidly to people I didn't think were paying attention. Now I know what I mean and how far I reach...and also how insignificant I sometimes am. Thank you for watching me try to become something better than I was.

These are my Big Bird shoes. I bought them to wear with my little boy on Halloween. There will never be anything more important than remembering to have fun with my child. This is a life well lived.