The unfortunate thing about the internet is the crazy people. There will always be haters, liars, and trolls. There will be anonymous people who are the best of humanity and want to help you. Then there are people who do their worst to take advantage of vulnerable hearts. Birth Mom #3 was more than likely a scammer and a troll. We were prepared for this possibility and knew that its an unfortunate reality than many adopting families face. In any adoption situation everyone needs to fall in love. When you start to interact with someone and red flags start to pop, trust your instincts. If you find yourself in this situation, do you know what to do? Just like with any major life decision, you must make choices with your brain instead of your heart. The steps to protect yourself in the adoption process are very simple.
What To Do If You Get Trolled By A Scammer
1. Never give away any information that isn't a matter of public record. When you meet the right birth mom you will naturally want to talk, but don't give away any private details. Speaking on your emotions is fine, but never give away major information about your finances, personal habits, or frequently visited places in your neighborhood.
2. Do not give a birth mom any money directly unless it's already been approved by your agency and/or attorney. Pretending to be interested in your family and waiting a few days to emotionally heighten the situation, then requesting immediate cash assistance because they need "help", is the most common route for a scammer/fake birth mom to take.
3. Advise your attorney or social worker when a birth mom has contacted you, and let them know if you feel the slightest twinge of doubt or like something is "wrong" in the situation.Take notes on the story you are being told. There are adoption anti-scam groups for adopting families where you can divulge the details of the scam that was tried on you.
4. Do not ever believe the existence of a child before it has been proven. You can be hopeful and you can be optimistic, but in adoption a child in not yours until it's in your arms and the adoption has been finalized.
5. If you have any identifying or contact information for the scammer, file a police report and report the phone number and scam to the FBI Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3).
Guard those hearts, trust your gut, and your shooting stars will find you.
-A.
About Me
- The McCann's Want To Adopt
- Hi! We are the McCann's. Our names are Ben & Anna. We are a loving family in Las Vegas, Nevada looking for an infant or young child to adopt. Baby makes 4! Our blog will outline the process we go through to finish our family through adoption. It's going to be honest. It's going to be hard. It's going to be obtrusive. We are publicly sharing our story because word of mouth has always been the most effective way to find a child that needs their forever family.
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